Time
by Cerulean Solitaire
Summary: *Tsuiokuhen Spoilers* Time heals all wounds... but not without a price. And you don't get to decide what that price is. Until you are healed, you suffer Life's pain. Time may need to rub salt into the wound in order to cure it.


Disclaimer: I don't own shit and you know it. Go sue yourself.  
  
hajime~  
  
I wake to a scream; a sickeningly ferocious battle-cry resounds through the... room?  
  
That's right, I'm still in the dôjô de gozaru. In fact, I haven't left. And especially not to the dark, shadowed streets of Kyôto.  
  
A dream. A nightmare, that's all it was... there is no Battôsai, there is no Shinsengumi, there is no blood spilling all over the streets, flowing, little crimson rivers....  
  
-And who caused them?- a voice grates against my nerves, cold, sarcastic... -who controls the crimson rivers?-  
  
...Relentless.... -who controls the blood? Who controls its flow, down, around, covering everything... everything in sight...?-   
  
I...  
  
I control the blood.  
  
I control the flow of blood, the lifeblood of this country... of the men inhabiting it....  
  
-That's right. You control the blood. You control this country, in your legends, now; but you still get to choose who lives or dies, you get to choose, you get to choose-- -  
  
I cut the voice off before it gains power over me, before its fire seeps into my eyes.... I... have no wish to become that again.  
  
-Maybe you don't have a choice.-  
  
Shut up!  
  
-Make me. Make the blood go away. Make it all disappear, make me disappear.  
  
-Let's see if you can, Rurôni-chan.-  
  
I have to... I have to do something....  
  
Anything....  
  
I glance at the shôji that separates myself from the outside; hazy red light makes the rice paper glow sullenly. Dawn.  
  
Funny, I've never seen the morning sky so red before.  
  
-The sky is bleeding. You made the sky bleed. You made the rain bleed. You made the bloody rain-- -  
  
I ignore the voice, finding the band to tie my hair back with. I should do the laundry de gozaru.  
  
- --You made the bloody snow, Kenshin, you made the snow bleed-- -  
  
My bangs spill in front of my eyes, redder than I remembered my hair to be... it must be the sun coming through the shôji.  
  
- --It bled all over *her...* the snow bled all over her, didn't it, Kenshin? Didn't it?  
  
-Or did she bleed on the snow?  
  
-Who caused the blood, Kenshin? Who caused it?  
  
-Who caused the bloody rain? An iris thrives in the rain, don't you know? Bloody rain... an iris is prettiest in the rain, Kenshin, it is prettiest in the rain de gozaru.-  
  
Shut up...  
  
-But it can't live in the snow, can it? An iris can't live in the snow de gozaru, an iris can't live in the snow...-  
  
I dip my hands into the water, submerging the stained cloth. One of Kaoru-dono's training gis, I note absently. Shut up... just shut up....  
  
-It'll die in the snow, don't you know? An iris will die in the snow. An iris will bleed in the snow....-  
  
Shut up.... I scrub absently at the stain-- wait... was it a blood stain? I don't remember it being a blood stain....  
  
- --An iris died in the snow-- -  
  
I don't remember how red it was....  
  
- --An iris bled in the snow-- -  
  
Red on white....  
  
- --An iris bled in the snow de gozaru, an iris died in the snow....-  
  
The water is red now, it's been tinted so red.... My hands... they're bleeding....  
  
-She died in the snow de gozaru yo, she bled in the snow de gozaru yo....-  
  
No... it's not my blood....  
  
-She bled in the snow de gozaru yo, she died in the snow-- -  
  
It's...  
  
-An iris bled in the snow-- -  
  
*Hers.*  
  
-An iris died in the snow....-  
  
And it's not Kaoru-dono's gi anymore, it's... *her* kimono... so snow white....  
  
But the blood...  
  
-An iris died in the snow.-  
  
The blood... all over the front of it, the collar, the right sleeve... there's so much blood....  
  
I've got to get the blood off.  
  
I... have to get the blood out of it....  
  
-She died in the snow, don't you know? She died in the snow-- -  
  
There's so much blood. So much... I scrub at the kimono, trying to dissolve a bloodstain over ten years old.  
  
-She died in the snow de gozaru yo....  
  
-She bled in the snow de gozaru yo-- -  
  
The water has turned completely to blood. It's so thick.... I pull my hands out; blood drips from them.  
  
Her blood....  
  
-You caused the blood, Kenshin, you made her bleed....-  
  
It's on my hands again.  
  
-You caused the blood, Kenshin-- -  
  
It's all over them....  
  
-You caused the bloody snow, don't you know? You caused the bloody snow....-  
  
Her blood covers my hands again.  
  
Not again....  
  
-You caused it....  
  
-You-- -  
  
There. A presence. All memories are silenced. What--  
  
"Kenshin?"  
  
...Oro?  
  
"Hai, Kaoru-dono...?"  
  
-Pretty little thing, don't you agree?-  
  
"...Daijôbu?"  
  
"Daijôbu" indeed....  
  
-Will you kill this one, too? Will this one suffer the bloody snow?  
  
-You caused the bloody snow, you know, you made it bleed--  
  
- --Made her bleed--  
  
-Will this one bleed, too?-  
  
You shut up.  
  
-Make me.-  
  
I'll never... I...  
  
I won't let that happen.  
  
Not ever.  
  
-Are you sure?-  
  
I smile my rurôni smile, hoping to assuage whatever fears she has. "Daijôbu de gozaru, Kaoru-dono."  
  
Yes. I'm sure.  
  
She doesn't seem entirely convinced; I turn back to the laundry, pretending not to notice. "Sessha just woke up early. Sumanai... did sessha wake you?"  
  
I'm glad the laundry has turned back into the laundry, without a trace of blood. "No, Kenshin, it's just--" she started. I pause, but don't turn around.  
  
-Pretty little thing, don't you agree?-  
  
You aren't helping.  
  
She sighed; I can almost see the apologetic smile. "It's nothing. I'm sorry to have troubled you."  
  
No trouble... you're no trouble at all....  
  
*I'm* trouble. Me and my bloody memories, my namesake, my legend....  
  
She walks off, most likely to wake Yahiko. I sense that she's still curious about something... she wanted to ask me something, didn't she? Something important... and I don't think it was about the laundry. I must have scared her off with my odd behavior. She'll come back, though... she'll come to me when she's ready to talk.  
  
I just hope I'll be ready to talk.  
  
-Give it time, baka, she won't come unless she knows you're ready.  
  
-She's so considerate...  
  
-And-- -  
  
Yes, let's not start on that tangent.  
  
Give it time, eh?...  
  
I smile as I sink my hands into the soapy water again. Time....  
  
In time, I can work things out.  
  
With myself... -especially yourself, baka- and with Kaoru.  
  
I pull the gi out of the water; the stain is gone.  
  
It only took a little time.  
  
~owari  
  
A/N: *beats muse with chopsticks* Sure (thwap) took (bonk) you (poke) long (pokity) enough (whap whap whap whappity whap)!!!  
  
Muse: @.@;;;  
  
*Returns to eating chicken fried rice* Chinese food gooood... ahem. Okay, I know I make Kenshin sound psychopathic. The -voice- originally started out as Battôsai, but it ended up being some kind of malicious conscience. o_-x I'm glad I'm not Kenshin.... And -it- was supposed to get a little more mundane towards the end, so don't worry if it seemed that way-- it's not just you. ^_^x  
  
Anyway, if you don't know anything about the Tsuiokuhen OVA, you'll be completely in the dark here. And I know there's a gap between where Kenshin ties his hair up and the laundry; that was intentional. I needed a break for the freaky conscience thing to torture Kenshin, and... well, I don't know how Kenshin does the laundry. ^_^x So, basically, Psycho-Jiminy had his little bout of fun while Kenshin drew the water or whatever. (Where do they keep dirty laundry, anyway? Are there clothes hampers in the Meiji Era?)  
  
This is kind of a replacement for Requiem, which I'll be taking down unless someone actually LIKES it and wants it to stay up. (Muse: not likely.) *holds up chopsticks* Anyway, I hope you all like this... and, since I seem to be getting NO reviews without asking, I'll ask. *clears throat*  
  
Please review! ^_^x  
  
Dômo arigatô, min'na-san!  
  
Oh, and the little -an iris can't live in the snow de gozaru- and -she died in the snow de gozaru yo- things are supposed to sound really, freakishly chanty - along with making random fun of our rurôni's speech - so don't think you're weird if they sounded that way. They're supposed to. And we all know I'm the weird one, ne?   
  
Muse: no comment.  
  
*glares at muse* You want the chopsticks again?  
  
Muse: ...Just review, people... _  
  
Good little musie... now, back to work! Move it! 


End file.
